Dealing with Negative Donor

I just left a visit with a prospective major donor to a major campaign. I am exhausted. This was a 2.5 hour long conversation where I was peppered with questions that were all across the board from how a particular client is doing to the specifics of how a parking lot is being repaved (“is it 1 inch or 1.25 from the grass?”) to whether or not I’m any good at fundraising (I am, in case you’re wondering). I don’t mind the questions, even the ones like questioning how good a fundraiser I am, in fact I love the questions because it shows that the prospect is engaging in the conversation. What drives me insane is when the prospect is negative about everything, and comes at everything with that mindset. It is mentally and emotionally exhausting for me to listen to that negativity, but I do my best to soldier on. I present a giving opportunity, listen to the donor, answer the questions that I can, write down the questions I can’t answer to get back to them about, and then I ask for the donation if it seems like an appropriate time. Today that meant asking someone for half a million dollars; tomorrow it means asking someone else for $5,000 dollars.

I’m sure every non-profit has at least one person like this in their database. I am fairly sure that we have a few. It is barely after lunch and I’m mentally and emotionally drained. I learned early on though, that if I let this negativity creep in it can easily grab a hold of my day or even my week and suck the productivity right out of it. To combat that negativity, I take some time to exercise, eat a decent meal, and meditate for a few minutes. I’m sure that seems like I’m wasting time to some, but if I’m going to be at my peak at work, I need to be at my peak in my head too.

Peanut Butter Comes to Visit

So I’m a little behind the ball on this, but a few weeks ago the girlfriend (codename: Peanut Butter) came to visit for her 30th birthday (for those of you keeping track, yes, I am dating an “older” woman haha). We visited a few wineries here in the beautiful Niagara Region, saw Niagara Falls from the Canadian side, ate some good food, and had good time… Here’s a couple favorites (or is it favourites, eh?):

Konzelmann Winery: Peanut Butter and I visited this one together, but I’ve been back on my own since then. It is one of the few wineries that sells wine by the glass and has an awesome view. I’m partial to the Baco Noir (if/when you ever order it, you have to order it as the “Baco Noir Zero”). It’s a nice semi-dry red with good very fruity overtones and bit of tobacco/earthy taste on the back end.

Château de Charmes Winery: Neither one of us particularly liked the wine at this one, but it was one of the few wineries that has a full tour associated to it. I would actually say that this one is worth the visit just for the tour. We got some great info on how the wine is made in the area and how wine country settled in to the Niagara Region. Again, however, none of the wines on the tasting were terribly impressive to either one of us.

Niagara Falls, Canada: True to our nature Peanut Butter felt the need to research before we went and I felt the need to just go. I won and we went with little to no research (I’ll admit that I looked up a place to park, but ultimately ended up parking somewhere else). We got some great pizza at Antica Pizza to start our Niagara Falls excursion (it’s a nice place just a few blocks from the falls). We had the Calabrese pizza minus the olives (despite my love of olives Peanut Butter is yet to see the glory of those deliciously salty little suckers) and I have to say that it was pretty darn good. Peanut Butter even says it was the best pizza she’s ever had.

Prince of Wales Hotel Lounge: Peanut Butter and I did her Birthday Dinner here after a few locals talked us out of going to a place called “Corks”… The décor was basically everything I want in my future home library. Dark wood, leather, and fireplaces everywhere. The locals told us to get the Fish and Chips (a favorite of ours already so not much convincing needed). The service was spot on and the Fish and Chips were amazing. We actually went back the next day for an afternoon snack of poutine (fries and cheese curds covered in gravy). Again great food!

Goodbye Dear Friend

About a month and a half ago I said goodbye to one of my long time companions: My truck, my rig, the runner, the big blue beast, the roller skate, the juke box on wheels, the 1994 Toyota 4Runner… This vehicle is the stuff that legends are made of and the reason that my children will drive Toyotas. I never actually tested it, but I’m fairly sure I could have peed in the gas tank and the thing would have kept running.

I was awful to the 4runner and it gave me nothing but love. On average I probably changed the oil once every 7500 miles (that might be a tad generous even), I literally wore out the tires to the point where the steel band was showing through the rubber, I kicked it when I was mad, I punched several (small) dents into it after getting into a fight with an ex on two separate occasions (same ex though), I drove over curbs to go off-roading on LU’s campus, I took the bumpy roads just because I could damn it… Through it all she just kept going. It is probably the best practical example of grace I can think of. I was terrible to the thing even though I knew I loved it, and it just kept going and going and going.

For the last decade the 4runner has been my wingman: I picked up countless dates in it, I broke up with girlfriends in it, girlfriends broke up with me in it, it was where I told a girl, “I love you” for the first time… I made memories in it.

The 4runner was probably my most constant companion for the last decade: it helped me move into my first home, it went along with me to pick up The Monster for the first time, it probably should have been an honorary member of my fraternity with all the trips we took in it, it took me on road trips (some on purpose and some not), it made sure my friends and I got home from bars, concerts, parties, and so much more (I never drove drunk however thanks to the handy little Breathalyzer I kept in it)…

I was sad to let her ago, but it was necessary. My new job requires me to drive to destinations unknown all across the US (and maybe Canada on occasion) and the 19 year old car with almost 200,000 miles on it and no AC just was not going to cut it. As happens too often in life we are forced to say goodbye to old parts so we can say hello to new ones.

So… Goodbye to my old 4runner and I would like to introduce you all to the new rig. Ladies and gentleman, here’s “Aloha”…

Peace and Love,

-jw

The Monster Origin Story...

So October is Pit Bull Awareness Month… Some of you know that several years ago I adopted the most love-a-bull dog a guy could ask for (codename: The Monster Under the Bed or just Monster). Most of you, however, never got the story behind me adopting the Monster so in honor of Pit Bull Awareness Month here’s the story:

I was 20-something, freshly graduated from college, in my first real job, just bought a house (well apartment building actually), and relatively newly single. All-in-all I was still normalizing myself to the real world and was, if I’m honest about it, lonely without a roommate and 40+ friends within 100 yards of me. I decided I wanted a companion and for me, at that time, that meant adopting a dog (I had already been convinced of the merits of adopting over buying by an ex).

With my adoption plan in mind I started scouring the shelter websites for a dog (yeah, I know that trying to pick out a dog on a web site is like trying to pick out a wife in a mail order bride magazine, but I was young, stupid, and nervous about adopting a dog so I wanted the most non-committal situation I could swing). I found several dogs I wanted to meet and visited several shelters. None of them were a good fit for me.

Finally I got around to visiting a dog at a shelter that had a one year old collie-shepherd-retriever mix. I was really excited about meeting this dog. I thought she might be the one. The adoption counselor put me in the closed off room with her. The dog went bonkers. She peed on my feet, shed several pounds of hair, was panting at a worrying rate, and even nipped at me a little. This obviously was not the dog for me. Somewhat dejected and let down I told the adoption counselor lady that I didn’t think this was the right animal for me. She then proceeded to ask about my lifestyle and what I was looking for (first shelter that did this, by the way). She told me, “Hmmmm… I think I might have a good fit for you. Do you have time to meet one more dog?” I agreed and she disappeared to the back room. When she came back she had black dog with her. She let the dog go. This 50lbs ball of black fur then rushed towards me, jumped into my lap (making me audibly “Ooooph”), and started licking my face.

Needless to say this love-a-bull little fur ball found a place in my heart at that very moment. As I talked to the adoption counselor I found out that Monster had been at the shelter for several months and that they were having trouble adopting her out because she was black (black dogs are apparently harder to adopt out… weird) and a pit bull. I also found out that she had been found running down the road with a chain around her neck and several scars on her body that were fairly evident of abuse. My heart melted a little more. About a week later this amazing little dog (well not so little, but I call her little) came home with me.

That was about five years ago. Since then Monster has been with me through it all. She’s my constant companion, my care taker (she has literally covered me with blanket when I’m sick), my exercise buddy, and so much more. For those of you that might be scared of pit bulls, come meet Monster. I can almost guarantee she’ll change your mind.

Peace and Love,

-jw

A Dog Stands on Its Hind Legs...

My girlfriend (codename: Peanut Butter or PB) has occasionally complained that she can’t take me anywhere because we’ll run into one of my ex-girlfriends throughout the greater St. Louis area (hey, it’s a hazard of living in the city that you grew up in and went to college in).

This complaint is apparently still valid at dear old Lambert Airport in St. Louis as well. I caught a glimpse of an ex (codename: Rock’em Sock’em) as she was sitting down at my gate, but it was only that, “a glimpse,” so I really wasn’t sure it was her (hell, it’s been 5+ years since I had seen her in person). I shot her a quick text message saying, “Odd question: you at gate c10 at lambert?”

There was no response for a little bit so I did one of those loud whispers, “Rock’em Sock’em?” She looked around in my general direction and then looked back down, but so did the girl that was sitting next to her so I figured either it wasn’t her and she just looked up because of a voice directed in her general direction or she was trying to ignore some blonde guy she used to date in high school. I get ignoring an ex in public and, let’s face it, running into an ex in public is like seeing a dog stand up on its hind legs; it is un-expected and somehow un-natural.

I boarded the plane and much to my surprise Rock’em Sock’em (or what I thought may be her look-a-like) sat down in my row on the other side of the plane. Then I get a text message saying, “What? Yes, I just boarded.” Turns out it was her and we texted a bit while on the tarmac before take-off and caught up briefly after the flight. We went upon our separate ways at baggage (have I mentioned that I hate having luggage when I travel? I have very seriously considered FedEx-ing things to my next destination). Seriously, though, totally like seeing a dog stand up on its hind legs…

Peace and Love, -jw

A H3N8 Influenza Virus

Man Contracts Dog Flu

Thursday June 25, 2009

8:22AM

While Swine Flu rages on and the WHO declares it a pandemic a new form of the influenza virus has now mutated to infect humans. The A H3N8 influenza virus, or more commonly known as the dog flu has infected a local St. Louis resident. He contracted the illness from his "cuddly wuddly little puppy" two days ago. Symptoms include a cold sweat around the nasal passages, a hard almost barking cough, a severe fever, and could lead to eventual death.

According to local authorities the man has risked both his own life and the lives of countless others in order to return to work today without seeking help from either a doctor or veterinarian.

Stay tuned for more details.

-jw

Lily's Mexican

I'm a South City native (in a round about kind of a way) with a true love of "ethnic" foods. When I moved into the South Hampton (SoHa for short) neighborhood about a year ago I was happy to see a Mexican restaurant just a short walk away.

My first experience with Lily's was on a Friday afternoon when a friend and I were looking to start the weekend off right with a few Margaritas. Lily's passed the first test with flying colors. Not only are the Margaritas here all hand mixed (none of that bottled mixed junk), but it also came with chips and access to salsa bar with some of the best salsa I've tasted.

As I continued to go back I started learning the menu pretty well and haven't run into anything I don't like. The recent fish taco special is probably the best I've had in St. Louis and I'm hoping it makes it's way onto the full menu in the near future. Simply great food and even better Margaritas.

Check it out,

jw

http://www.lilysstl.com/